This week a British nuclear submarine limped into Gibraltar for repairs. If a similar French sub had called into nearby Bordeaux, we would never have heard a thing. But, this being a British colony ‘quite different’ from the bits of Spain in North Africa, all hell has broken loose once again. The Gibralterians are furious because the British government told the Spanish government in advance more than they advised them. The Spanish media is up in arms because they were told nothing by Madrid and now want answers to questions such as “Is it a genuine breakdown?” and “Are we all going to be blown to smithereens?” And the Spanish government is incensed because its commendable softly-softly approach to the eternal problem of Gibraltar has gone awry and it now stands accused of being naïve in the face of more perfidy from Albion. Its less-than-brilliant response has been to refuse to answer questions but to say they now believe the British government might have been lying about the extent of the damage so they are considering asking the Spanish secret service to investigate matters. Quite how this will help matters is anyone’s guess.

The good news is that some Spanish commentators see this for the nonsense it is. But imagine what it would be like if Spain had a real tabloid press.