Dawn

Dawn

Saturday, April 22, 2006

The latest edition of the Rough Guide describes England as “a nation of overweight, alcohol-swilling, sex-and-celebrity- obsessed TV addicts” And “A country of overpriced, under-funded public transport services, where the hearts of many towns, and increasingly their outskirts, consist of identikit retail zones.” But the guide is not entirely critical, describing the English as "animal-loving, tea-drinking, charity donors who thrive on irony and BBC Radio 4". And England is seen as a haven for refugees, where individuality and creativity flourish, fuelling a "thriving pop culture and producing one of the most dynamic fashion, music and arts scenes to be found anywhere.” The guide adds that the natural beauty of England's beaches can compare with those of the Mediterranean and the Caribbean. All this seems fair enough to me. Except the bit about the beaches, perhaps. A spokesperson for the English Tourist Board pointed out the English were not alone in being "overweight and sex-and- celebrity-obsessed TV addicts". Which is sadly true.

Meanwhile, on a broader political front, it seems the feast of England’s patron saint, St George, will be celebrated tomorrow with more patriotic fervour than ever before. This, of course, is the consequence of giving devolution [and more money] to both the Scots and the Welsh. Not to mention having a government stuffed full with Scots and a parliament in which Scottish members are allowed to vote on English matters, whilst English members are denied the same right in respect of Scottish affairs. In Spanish terms, it’s as if Zapatero’s cabinet comprised mainly Catalans bored at the prospect of just running an increasingly independent Catalunia. One near-term indication of English dissatisfaction with this mare’s nest will be a significantly increased number of seats for the BNP right-wing, nationalist party in the May local council elections. Longer term, it’s not too fanciful to see a separate English parliament, though not whilst the Labour government has to rely on Scottish MPs to keep it in power.

But what do I care? I dined outside in warm sunshine this evening and there were no overweight, alcohol-swilling, sex-and- celebrity-obsessed TV addicts in the tapas bar where I enjoyed my battered squid, my zamburiñas in garlic and my glass of albariño. Except me, of course. And I don’t count.

No comments: